You should read the Nick Krauser books. They are expensive and only available as physical copies on Lulu. But they are also far more in-depth than almost any forum post, blog, or website. If you spend any amount of time here, they are going to be worth the money because they explain in detail the theory and practice of fucking hot girls, just like the very good textbooks in college are chosen because they’re comprehensive and will accelerate your learning / knowledge.
In my head I’m good with women but on reading the Krauser memoirs I’ve started to realize that I’m not, not really. I have some key advantages in terms of looks, vibe, and a willingness to take rejection, but I’m not good. I could never write Adventure Sex because I don’t know enough to write it. We’re around the same age, maybe I’m a little older, but he seems to consistently f**k higher quality girls than I do. I can get high-quality chicks… just less consistently. For like two years I was seeing this girl who was 19 – 21 cause she was working in a coffee shop and I worked her there, but that was an anomaly and I know it. When she wanted to move in with me and I said no things came to their end.
Adventure Sex is mostly about the processes that lead to success. It also recognizes the darkness that tinges Krauser’s writing. Sometimes he makes the darkness explicit, as when he fucks one girl and she says:
“You should give my boyfriend sex lessons. You’re so good at it!” A man doesn’t want to hear that. Superficially it’s great for the ego to know you’re cucking another guy – it’s like stealing his lunch money – and also to be flattered about your sexual prowess. The downside is it forces you to look into the abyss. Men Really don’t like to know how depraved and wanton women really are. We prefer the purity fantasy.
When I was younger I think I preferred the purity fantasy also, especially about the woman who I was with for a lot of my 20s and who is the mother of two of my children (yes, I checked via DNA, for those of you wondering). But purity isn’t real and most women can be turned towards hot adventure sex. In most women the desire to be fucked by a hot guy is there, however subdued it is. I remember the first time I fucked a married woman in her mid-30s (or really I just got fucked by her). She was hot enough for me and it was easy to read the boredom in her eyes, but she basically took me up more than me taking her up. If you are like most guys and wait for chicks you will not do as well as you can. With her I felt both dominant and disgusting after it. It’s a strange but real sensation and the sort of thing you do not read on Reddit very much (I think because most of the guys here are not so experienced, or as experienced as they claim). Experiencing deep, conflicting emotions is somewhat common in real life but does not get a strong airing on Reddit. That woman was one of the keys for me, and she helped me fully understand the (hot) depravity that a lot of women are capable of, but that much of society tries to hide from men.
Truth is that with her I didn’t do that much apart from opening the door. If it hadn’t been me it would’ve been someone else. I want to get even better though and make more things happen, but getting better means knowing your weaknesses and systematically working to improve them.
I am rambling some but the point is that the book is good, and pretty much every chapter I highlighted a section that made me go, “Yes, that is exactly how it is.” Or:
The ten minutes after sex are probably the only times in my life I have a genuinely clear mind, freed from sexual desire and at peace with the world. Women can’t fully appreciate just how thoroughly the sex drives dominates a man’s life. He’s never free of it. It’s testosterone that determines your libido and men have seventeen times more of it than women.
I feel similarly but to do good work I have to thrust sex out of my mind and focus solely on work, forcing my attention to it if need be. It’s mostly after work that the sex drive comes flooding back and I find myself on the hunt, thinking and acting with my dick, chasing chicks, looking online, in bars, escorts, the sex tapes I’ve made, whatever, depending on what I need and what the options are. I don’t live in a great place for day game and that is a shame because if I did I would try it more (I am also not very good at it).
The paradoxes of being a really successful guy are many, and I do not see them discussed as often as I should. The thinking here is too binary, too black and white in a world filled with gray and ambiguities. Paradoxes like, “Successful player have it within themselves to maintain that empirical mindset while also being creative, inductive and deductive at the same time.” Most guys are empiricists or creatives, but the best ones fuse the two.
I talked about the darkness earlier and it strikes again at the end of the book:
Most men are not sexually attractive and in 2009 that described me. I’d experienced White Man God mode in Japan but knew it was overrated – it’s never the hot Asian girls who play that game with you. Gamme males such as 2009-vintage me play that game because they are completely frozen out of their own mating markets. Better a mid-level Asian girl than a fat Western sow.
Game had promised a way out – a secret system of tricks and wheezes to bullshit women into bed, or so I thought in the beginning. That promised to be something I lacked. I began my journey with a crushing burden of negative limiting beliefs, all stemming from that one gnawing self-esteem issue – I wasn’t attractive to girls.
The journey of becoming attractive took many years and many tries. The things that drive him may not drive you. Like for him it is all about the new girl and the next girl and he does not want to spend time with the girls mostly. I really like that and I am also obsessed with making my own porn videos, so I am not the same as him and neither are you. I like group sex and anonymity and other things like that, things that some of you here will think are degenerate but I find them super hot. Your goals will change with what you really want. I also have an extreme aversion to fat girls and have sometimes said pointlessly mean things to them. I have also sometimes talked about why diet matters and discipline and other psychological things that fat girls don’t get, unless they want to stop being fat.
There are a lot of posts on Krauser’s website, but they cannot achieve the comprehensiveness of the books. Books and long-form narrative are still irreplaceable, and if the only reading you do is fragmentary Internet stuff you are wasting time and mental energy. Yes, Reddit is useful in its place but it cannot and will not replace books. You will very rarely get real experts on Reddit, here or in the seduction subsection. Sorry. I know I am not a real expert but I also have a decent idea of what real experts are like.
Real seduction experts are also rare because most guys eventually settle in with a hot, high-quality woman. It takes an unusual guy to keep at the game (“Had I been a normal man, I’d have married her already. Sadly, I’m not a normal man.”) I think he’s got an extremely avoidant attachment style. If you Google Scholar some more you will find it. I don’t know if that issue comes from childhood or from his first wife or what, but I do not think very many people could live anything like him.
There are bad parts of Adventure Sex. Krauser is a flaming, incredible racist. It also seems that his earlier failures with women haunt them in a way that may be familiar to some of you but are not familiar to me. I did pretty well with girls in high school / college, so I look at that time as a period of fun and experimentation rather than failure. I am not filled with resentment about missed opportunities, etc. One senses that his early failures drive his present obsessions, and that is not true of me. I am driven more by pure hedonism and the realization that the conventional path is fucked up.
The reader experiences a lot of cognitive dissonce reading Krauser’s racist and anti-semitic sentences and metaphors, because one would think that a person so smart in some domains would be able to transfer that intelligence into others. Instead, one experiences a sense of disgust. One also notes that the girls Krauser bangs don’t know about (or seek to know about) his racist ideas, or, if they do not, they don’t punish him for it.
But I keep reading because despite his ugly comments he has accomplished something few men do and come back to report on it.
Apart from Krauser, these are the best books I’ve encountered for learning game.