Like I mentioned, I took Bike Girl to the sex party, and from my perspective it went pretty well. She was incredibly, cutely nervous and anxious and kept talking about calling it off. But I told her that I’d RSVPed and that being a flake is bad. She’s a woman, though, so flaking is in her nature.
I knew about half the people there, so the social proof aspect was high. I encouraged her to kiss other women, which she was reluctant to do at first but after two drinks and some gentle encouragement from me and the crowd she got into it. Like most women she wants to be led, gently but firmly, and I was in my element while she was out of hers.
Bike didn’t sleep with anyone else and neither did I (a low-stakes strategy I recommend in the free book). I think this was an “eye opening” experience for her, though, and it expanded the range of her possibilities. We talked a lot about what it would be like before and what it would be like after.
Bad news is that the hosts of the party don’t have the face control they could. There were about four other attractive couples and one or two other attractive women, and far too many overweight people. But, water finds its own level and people tend to find their level of attractiveness. I’ve left parties without any attractive counterparties in them, and you should too.
We’re going to go back to another one, I’m sure. Most interesting from a game perspective, near the end of the party I was getting another drink and spotted one of the other attractive women coming back from the bathroom. Chatted for a minute and then got her phone # on a napkin. I’ve been seeing Bike Girl every other day or so, but last week on one of the off days I went to get a drink with this girl. She knew what was up, I think, and didn’t tell her boyfriend about it.
Now, this is pretty unusual, and I’ve tried this before and more often than not it fails. Most women will not do things independently without their partner; in this case, if she’d been unwilling, I would’ve tried to set up a 2:2 date. But she was willing and there was very little game; she was a “yes girl” and I already knew her secret, as she knew mine. That’s one reason I like the non-monogamy community: done well it’s an easy, easy place to fish. Downside is that few 8+ women exist in it. They’re often in private groups and parties. If your goal is to hit the very top of the attractiveness curve hit the streets, hit the gym, don’t think too much about this scene, unless you’ve got an attractive girl already into it, at which point your goal becomes filtering.
But if you want some easy novelty and like group sex like I do, simple pickup can work.
I hesitate to post about this because, like I said, the Party Girl situation fails more often than not, and there isn’t a lot of lesson to take other than “take the shot.” I don’t think my game is strong and that’s part of the reason I post those links in the sidebar. The guys listed there likely have far stronger technical game.
In a couple weeks I’m going to try and take Bike Girl to a sex club. She’s hesitant about making this a regular thing but she’s not saying no. I wrote this in another post, but in my experience about a quarter of girls are excited by non-monogamy and sex clubs. About a quarter say no outright. About half are intrigued and can be led to it. Bike Girl is in that half.
Most guys in the scene have zero game, so they aren’t good at bringing new girls in. I have some game, so over the years I’ve built up a reputation that Bike Girl has reinforced. This opened up and opens up a lot of new opportunities, because no one really knows how attractive a guy is, including girls, but everyone knows how pretty the girl a guy has is. Bring in pretty girls and the girls will want you more.
To me this is next-level game. Not many guys think this way, from what I can tell. Most guys are also bad in bed, which limits their appeal in the scene. But for a put-together guy, it can be a gold mine.
Last week or two have been crazy. Almost too crazy. I said I was getting bored of the game, and I am, but then when it’s right in front of me, I don’t act bored.
I’ve said before that I think sex drives me more than the ego boost from seduction. I wonder if in actuality fear of reliance on a single woman drives me more than anything else. That doesn’t seem likely to me but it doesn’t seem impossible either.