“A lot of women don’t enjoy hookup culture—so why do we force ourselves to participate?”

A lot of women don’t enjoy hookup culture—so why do we force ourselves to participate?” More accurately, a lot of women are very happy to compete for the highest-status men. Women are not stupid and know that the highest-status men have lots of options. If a woman doesn’t grab his attention quickly, he’ll give it to another woman.

It is true that women don’t like it when a high-status man has sex with them, then ditches them. That may sour their feelings about “hook ups,” even as they’re still motivated to engage in them (with a sufficiently high-status man). For some women, chasing a high-status man is a gamble to get him to invest, and he often doesn’t. Women (correctly) worry that if they fail to hook up with a high-status man, some other woman will get him.

Plus, lots of women like hookups with a sexually competent man. Since a lot of men are sexually incompetent, the attraction to hooking up goes down.

There are also some women who like hooking up a lot, and they drive the narrative (Ms. Slav is like that, and I’m sure she’s broken up relationships before). The book Cheap Sex discusses this dynamic. The author also has not read Date-onomics. The book explains how small changes in the male-female ratio can lead to large changes in behavior. If there are more males in a given situation, there is more monogamy and commitment. If there are more females, there is greater promiscuity. Middlebury is 52% female, which is pretty good for women by the standards of modern colleges.

As usual, the writer doesn’t understand how female psychology evolved and doesn’t fully understand female preference for the highest-status men. Once a person understands that women are in intense competition with other women for high-status men, and that high-status men typically have multiple female offers to choose from, the supposed “dislike” for hookup culture while participating in it anyway becomes clear. Women may say they dislike hookup culture when they actually dislike not having emotional and relationship access to the high-status man they want both from.

Author: The Red Quest

How can we live and be in society?

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