Discretion and the Secret Society

Years ago, a lover learned about a mutual acquittance I’d fucked before her. My then-lover was shocked and wanted to know why I hadn’t told her. My answer: I don’t gossip about sex and respect my lovers’ confidentiality. That kind of answer is terrible to use with most women, because it’s too logical, so I added that I will also respect her confidentiality. I’ll apply the same standards to all my lovers.

I told her to think about what will happen in the future, when she finds a provider guy to have kids with. Does she want me running around, blabbing to whoever, that we had sex?

She weakly argued that she wouldn’t care. I told her that both her and I know that’s not true.

It’s good practice not to tell current lovers the real, full names of past lovers. Let them find out on their own, if at all. If a girl gets mad about your past, promise them discretion in the future. Live that way and you will reduce problems for yourself.

The major exception to this rule is women who are deeply and congruently in the sex party scene. They are typically not as sensitive and will often be open to threesomes and group sex. For normal girls, however, reputation is paramount and guys who can shut the fuck up will help preserve their reputations. Let girls talk about the guys they’ve fucked.

As a guy, you also don’t need to brag about your past conquests to women. Women will be able to tell if you’re sexually experienced just from how you are.