Emotions and Ms. Slav, Low-cut top girl and a weird foursome

Last Friday, after a decent interval since I’d last seen her (er, had sex with her…), Ms. Slav came over and we discussed this, and what else in her life has been going on (a lot), what else has been going in mine (not that much), and the nature of being in different stages of life. The sex was weirdly tender and emotional… I don’t think it was “goodbye sex,” but it may be “de-escalation” sex. She is still learning a lot of things (more on that later). One nice thing about Ms. Slav is that pretty much any time we get together, we have sex, no matter what else is happening. Regular f**king really does smooth over a lot of other issues… if more women understood this and implemented it, the divorce rate would be considerably lower. Just getting on the knees and sucking a couple times a week really does strengthen relationships. Couples therapists need to start assigning blowjob therapy if they are serious about helping people in relationships.

Low-cut top girl DID show up to the foursome, and I was pretty surprised. She dressed in an outfit very similar, or maybe identical, to the one she was wearing the night I met her… only two months ago… feels like a lot longer.

The foursome was pretty straightforward, although early on the woman in the other couple asked a lot of questions about how we know each other and what our relationship is like. I thought I might be headed home alone, as the other couple could tell we don’t know each other well. Many couples prefer to swap with another established, firm couple, as that limits some kinds of jealousy, as well as some mate-poaching behavior. Alcohol and novelty won the day, however, and I split a hotel room with the other guy. Woman was pretty but not too special, late 20s/early 30s, and she and her man had clearly made the full swap decision ahead of time. The other guy wanted to make a sex tape (like me!), but she nixed it. All in the game. I did a really nice job railing her from behind and got into that zone where the sex is pleasurable but not so overwhelming as to make me finish early. The woman also didn’t tighten as much as some women do when they orgasm, so that let me keep going. High-performance nights are always nice.

The other guy had performance troubles, so I gave him a bit of substance to help, and about 45 minutes later he was ready to go. I told him that it’s common to seek certain aids in that situation, as it can be harder to perform in a group among novel participants than among basic one-on-one sex. Plus, just trying to put people at ease when they’re uncomfortable or anxious goes a long way to solving discomfort or anxiety. “It’s okay, don’t worry about it, it happens to everyone sometimes” are all magic words. Sort of like how players know that “It’s okay, you can leave any time you want to” often disarms LMR. I have sometimes stood up when I’m with a girl and moved away from her and said, “The door is right over there. I’m not forcing you to do anything you don’t want to do. You can walk out now or any time.” A little comfort is useful.

Overall a successful evening. Low-cut top girl was annoyed that I wouldn’t let her stay in the hotel. I needed to go home and told her needed to as well. She argued that I had already paid for the hotel, which was true, but I told her that I also needed to go home. I told her that if she wanted to stay she had to give them her credit card, which she wouldn’t do. Bit of an ugly scene. May have cued the other couple to make an independent play for her. I hope they do. Low-cut top girl is absolutely the sort of chick who’d clean out the mini-bar and order $500 in bullshit on my card. Doesn’t speak well of her, now that I read my own description of her. I need to find more compatible chicks. I would actually trust Ms. Slav not to do that kind of shit. She might do it inadvertently, because that’s what she does in expensive hotels.

This week, Low-cut top girl has been sending me a lot of messages (many of them I’m not replying to, in keeping my “once per day at most” texting and Internet distraction philosophy) but refusing to come over… that might be for the best. We’ve been on an accelerated timeline, so maybe from open to ending is going to occur in less time than usual. After our foursome that is surprising, even to me, but that foursome may have been a one-time thing. She samples the food, doesn’t care for it, is glad she tried it, moves on with her life.

Low-cut top girl also wants to know why I don’t take her out to dinner, which, along with music/concerts, has been a historical sore point and push-pull point for me and chicks. I told her to read The Millionaire Next Door (a great book, you should read it). I might give her a copy if I see her again, though she is the kind of girl who is going to yo-yo back and forth or just ghost me when she finds another dude. I have lower financial discipline than I did when I really had no money… I need to quit buying camera gear, which is a vice of mine… but I still have pretty decent financial disipline… and part of that is just not spending money on stupid shit like expensive dinners out. I like a lot of what are now called “fast casual” places… she apparently likes expensive sit-down places? I dunno, I can countenance those at work… I can deal with them rarely… a lot of the time I’d rather just have some falafel or a burrito bowl, plus extra cash in pocket. Real freedom is not having to worry about money.

Most restaurants are also just too damn noisy, and that’s terrible for social bonding or learning.

Mostly, though… it’s the money… and the number of people who are better to talk to, than a book is to be read… well… it’s not as high as I’d like. This girl also liked expensive restaurants, but she was kind of weird in public… she’d be fine in private, one-on-one, but didn’t interact well in public. It was like dating two different chicks, personality-wise. Oddly, that girl wants to get a drink w/ me… I have been meaning to do it.

I tweeted, “Building the mind is a lifelong project.” If you are not reading you are probably not learning as much as you can or should.

Ms. Slav, though… Ms. Slav is also discovering the downside of saying “yes” too much… she is stretched thin. I would phrase it as, she is giving away a lot of value… so everyone is coming out to grab some… and she needs to retract / guard her value a little better. Chicks would never frame something this way… but that is what I see. I told her about my growing discomfort with how I am living, and my desire to do something different. I think she gets it. Although she thinks I can do family AND do the life I have been living… it’s not impossible, just really f**king unlikely. One rule in game is to assume the median girl, at least until proven otherwise. Guys know that it’s POSSIBLE to be standing around at a regular party or whatever, and have some stunning 8 open you and then f**k her later that night. It’s also POSSIBLE for Tinder to work that way. It’s just super unlikely. You want to take high-percentage shots. In today’s NBA, that means threes or right next to the basket. It’s POSSIBLE to win with a lot of long twos… just not likely.

Guys who want to win, try to put themselves in the best position possible to win at whatever their game is. For a guy who wants to be in the game, that means moving to a city and not living in a rural area or an exurb. For a guy who wants a kid (or more kids), how I am living… is not the optimal way to go about that goal.

With Low-cut top girl, I feel like I am experiencing deja vu… she is new to me but is overall close to the typical female. So close that I feel like I’ve already seen everything she says or does. Ms. Slav is the exact opposite.

Author: The Red Quest

How can we live and be in society?

6 thoughts on “Emotions and Ms. Slav, Low-cut top girl and a weird foursome”

  1. You linked MMM! You’re definitely that sort of guy, heh. As I think I’ve mentioned before, I’m truly impressed that you don’t realize what you bring to the table as a RP writer – you’re more mature and more stable than most of the other guys, speaking not only about adjacent subjects, but discussing the intermediate/advanced aspects in length [both regarding age and maintenance of relationships]. Both you and Nash are older, got-their-shit-together guys.

    This is not to say that the other writers are not valuable – they’ve got the experience and also bring lots to the discussion; however, while there are a few very established blogs on the daygame, approach, younger part of the trip, it’s really engaging to read what both you and Nash write.

    For an example, you’re always discussing books and recommending books to women [and to the readers] and I bet you just don’t talk more of it because they’re not exactly RP-related. You leave a lot out due to what seems to be your own rules on this blog – some you touch lightly [work], some are clearly verboten [kids].

    And, for me as a non-US, my personal favourite: you’re not wading into the deep end of crazy theories of the destruction of your country or how women are evil. As I said, older, got-your-shit-together, stable.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Maintaining anonymity is important… guys w/ real jobs and reputations don’t want to be outed, and I’m sure the “why” is obvious. It’s lame to keep some pieces hidden away, but this is just a little side something… I don’t want to be identified.

      I am a sort of “Five whys” guy too. Why do we work? To make money. Why make money? To pay the rent/mortgage, have a place to live, food, etc. Why do we do that? So we survive. Why survive? To experience pleasure, joy, satisfaction, making the world a better place, etc. What is the highest joy/satisfaction? Often, it’s fucking. So we should do more of that.

      Many guys get stuck on the money part, or get lost in video games, etc. It’s useful to ask yourself, “If you have all the money, then what?” Often you don’t need as much as you think, and it’s very hard to resist the powerful marketing machine that is all around us.

      I’m not seeing very many guys in their 20s, in their game prime, writing online right now. Are there some who I am missing?

      >>And, for me as a non-US, my personal favourite: you’re not wading into the deep end of crazy theories of the destruction of your country or how women are evil. As I said, older, got-your-shit-together, stable.

      These guys are way overreacting to some mildly bad trends. Modern feminism is shit, that’s true. There are some bad policies that are being widely pursued in the United States. But the country is not being destroyed, we will survive, and overall life is very good. If anything it is TOO good, and there are too few formative challenge experiences, so guys seek them in video games instead of the real world. Many of the end-of-the-world guys are just ridiculous.

      It has never been a better time to be a player.

      The Internet is great for many things (https://theredquest.wordpress.com/2019/01/10/you-are-part-of-the-revolt-of-the-public-and-the-crisis-of-authority-in-the-new-millennium/), but it also gives whiney hysterics and dysfunctional whiners a huge platform and a way to find each other. We find many from both group among both feminists AND men’s rights groups. Kinda makes you think, eh?

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      1. “Many guys get stuck on the money part, or get lost in video games, etc.”

        I remember reading in another post how you did not get why so many people are drawn to videogames. Maybe it’s a generation thing, but I can tell you why I feel the allure and, at times, find it hard to resist. First of all, videogames are fun and they have been getting more immersive and developed in the last 15 years or so. There’s that.

        Second, life is pretty hard [also, that text you wrote on choosing the hard way – fantastic]. Videogames are challenging, but offer clear victories, trophies, rankings. You kill the boss, you solve the puzzle, you got the items, you are rewarded and can show off to your buddies. It’s escapism + fake social status.

        Finally, in the internet, no one knows you’re a dog. If your life is shitty, you can still be the top guy at one game or another. You have no money to travel, but you travel the whole fantastic world in that reality. You work as a clerk at a grocery store, but in the game, you’re the general of an army with 1,000 members around the globe. You never get laid and fail at social interations, but people vie to be your friend in the game world [even if these people are actually NPCs]. It’s a trap, but well-built, enticing trap for my generation and the younger ones.

        “I’m not seeing very many guys in their 20s, in their game prime, writing online right now. Are there some who I am missing?”

        I can’t tell. I was thinking of the guys in their 30s or that wrote earlier. Writing is great ’cause there is an archive you can consult. I imagine there are some younger guys publishing through Instagram or other social media, but truth is many are just selling what to a guy who is more experienced sounds fake or exaggerated [think RP reddit].

        “Modern feminism is shit, that’s true. ”

        Maybe we’re agreeing or disagreeing, depending on your concept of “modern feminism”. I’ll give the perspective of someone who is not from a developed, Northern country. Feminists make mistakes and there are lots of problems we could point out, but there are also real issues that are pretty fucked up. Away from novelty magazines and blogs, in small towns or other countries, they fight an actual battle. Just think that in Switzerland, women had no right to vote in federal elections till 1971; there are countries where it’s legal to sell your daughter or that’s mandatory to mutilate their genitals; where women can’t get a driving license or work without the permission from their father or their husband. I don’t mean to turn this into unproductive politics debate, so I thought I just should offer my pov from another country. Those women who make questionable claims online may also be the ones who fight for reasonable causes.

        As you said yourself, “[the internet] also gives whiney hysterics and dysfunctional whiners a huge platform and a way to find each other. We find many from both group among both feminists AND men’s rights groups. Kinda makes you think, eh?” There many men who discuss RP and related subjects from a weak, rabid, hateful pov; they take serious discussions and turn into pathetic rants. Again, that’s why guys like you and Nash are important.

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  2. “She’s giving a way a lot of her value right now” on Ms Slav. That’s well said. I see a lot of girls in the US go through this party phase in their late teens / early 20s. It’s fun to be a part of but if you like the girl you also hate seeing her do it. I sense it affects them longer term. It’s one of the reason I prefer dating college aged girls, I got tired of meeting women late 20s who were trying to put that past behind them

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  3. Let’s see the words you associate Ms. Slav with: Tender, Emotional, Trust, Mature and obviously the requisite Sex, Blowjobs, Hot, etc.

    Seems to me she fits your idea of the “One”/”Unicorn”, whatever that means to you. So time to throw caution to the wind or at least re-escalate? The the skeptics/MGTOWers may frown upon such behavior but then what do they know- they’ve never felt anything like this.

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    1. No, as she is too young. Most of the story is gathered in here. Five years ago I would have gone very far with her, but less so now.

      “MGOTW” has always struck me as pretty stupid. I do get and respect the impulse to take a break, find yourself, stay away from society for a while, re-center, those kinds of things. But the idea that normal healthy men can lead a healthy and happy life without sex or female influence is ridiculous.

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