For most guys, 97% or more, it’s still about the basics… this story is copied from a woman on Twitter, although the woman, under the name “Mom Folding Laundry” (don’t ask me why she picked that pseudonym) eventually deleted her account,
at some point during the courtship dance, you DO need to let her know you are interested. Sexually. Because, believe it or not, she may not know.
This is a funny story from my own dating days.
In my mid-20s, I played ultimate frisbee. One day, a couple guys joined our game. One blond, the other dark haired. Blond guy was SUPER attractive and extremely good at ultimate frisbee. They both came to our after-game potluck. I can’t recall what happened, but I didn’t really consider either of them dating options. However, I did get the dark haired one’s number.
And one night when I was bored, called him for a drink. NOT because I was into him. I really just wanted to leave the house. So I have a drink with the guy, and the whole time, he’s singing the praises of his blond friend. So much that I’m wondering if he’s trying to tell me he’s gay. I was super confused.
Then, some time later, he invited me for dinner with him…and blond friend. Like…okay?
But that was THE ENTIRETY of my contact with these guys. A year and a half later, I ran into Blond Guy. I told him I was engaged to my husband. Blond Guy said, “Why did you pick him over me?”
Like…this was a guy who IN NO WAY made it clear he liked me. He didnt ask me out. He didnt try to kiss me. He didnt even have his friend pass me a note like we were in middle school to tell me he liked me. HOW was I to know?!?!?!? And this was a HANDSOME guy. An athletic guy.
But even he couldn’t date properly.
This is a failure of basic escalation. Super basic. Both guys in the story fail.
A lot of guys will succeed by improving their value, talking to chicks, asking chicks out, showing straightforward interest, and then trying to f**k them. The advanced game stuff you read… that’s the back 10 or 20%…. most guys don’t have the first 80 or 90% down… the stuff that’s like, “Have some balls.” “Make a move.” “Don’t be afraid of rejection.” “Rejection is better than regret.” “Hit the gym.”
In real life, I have heard many MANY women tell stories similar to this woman’s story. Most guys aren’t even taking the easy shots.
In real life, I was like those clueless guys until I was like 20 / 21.
How many women do you think those guys missed because they didn’t say, “Give me your phone number, and let’s get a drink.” Because they didn’t say, “Why don’t we go back to my place and listen to music / watch a movie?” Back at his place, kiss her. Then the rest. A lot of guys will be helped just by looking the girl in the eye and escalating. So that she knows he’s interested. Sexually.
This chick was so potentially into them that SHE CALLED THEM. That doesn’t happen much. And one or both of them still botched it by not escalating, at all.
Women have these kinds of stories (the linked woman is not a PC SJW lunatic, so that’s cool… not every woman on Twitter is a raving SJW lunatic). Guys they might have f**ked if the guy had made the move. I am interested in exploring the back half of the game that is very little discussed, while also knowing that this woman is right, most guys are guilty of, “IN NO WAY made it clear he liked me.” Most guys “couldn’t date properly.” That means super basic escalation. A lot of girls aren’t getting f**ked, and a lot of guys aren’t f**king, because the guy doesn’t do super simple escalation. I have written this before, but a decent number of my lays came about from girls who were kind of passive or awkward… but who went along… with me… back to my place until we were f**king. A lot of guys in normal life who are considered “players” just have good eye contact, decent bodies, and they escalate until the girl says no…. and sometimes she never says no.
9 thoughts on “Basics like asking the girl out and escalation”
“I can’t recall what happened, but I didnt really consider either of them dating options.”
This tells me they read her signals at the potluck correctly and didn’t escalate. She never tingled for either of them.
She, and most other women, are retconning past events to complain that sexy men didn’t chase/court her like she wished them to.
Disagree here… most guys are terrible at reading signals. She might have been open to them. They hid their dicks.
Don’t hide your dick.
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