Bodi’s book *Death by a Thousand Sluts*, on pickup and escaping being a gamma

I read Bodi’s book Death By a Thousand Sluts, Part Two… the content is very good but the book effort itself has some half-assed qualities, as it does not even include mobi or epub versions, though the writing itself is often very funny and misanthropic… much funnier than the handful of stupid celebrity memoirs I have picked up, like a half-wit. Bodi, though, seems to (seemed to?) hate everyone, including himself, yet, fortunately, he is unwilling to off himself, and thus we have his two memoirs. Hate, despair, and contempt are very bad internal emotions for anyone trying to achieve anything social, including picking up chicks, so getting over those internal emotions is a huge part of his battle.

Although the book’s topic is Bodi’s internal journey and game experiences… if you read it, you will notice how much of it is really about Bodi’s relationship to Krauser, like an abused wife who cannot leave her man. Bodi cannot leave his guru/teacher/abuser but cannot not leave him either, and the scenes between them, as well as his love-hate for Krauser, could itself be a book, “Krauser & Me: A Love Story.” I’d read it.

For guys, the meta lessons from this book, *Death by a Thousand Sluts*, are to lift, to have or find purpose, and to focus on craftsmanship. Bodi doesn’t lift and consequently he is probably less attractive to women than he would be otherwise. This seems to be one of Krauser‘s hurdles as well, as his books include some photos of him, and he often looks like a head of cattle the day ax falls. That he can have that bad a body and yet still achieve game success is testament to the power of game and extreme grinding, but I have found it more pleasant to work out (makes you feel good) and also reap the sexual rewards. That is probably why my game is not that sharp, as I have relied on other dimensions to achieve my ends. If you are the sort of wanker who is spending time on Twitter, you have seen links to Cues of upper body strength account for most of the variance in men’s bodily attractiveness, as well as Hand Grip Strength and Self-Perceptions of Physical Attractiveness and Psychological Well-Being. I will summarize them as “stronger, more cut guys are happier and f**k more.” “Estimates of physical strength determined over 70% of men’s bodily attractiveness.” If you are not working on your physical body as well as your clothes then you are likely just leaving lays on the table for no good reason, except that you love sugar too damn much and need to pump some iron. Go read Arnold’s biography to get pumped for getting pumped.

It is painful at times to read a tale of so much self-sabotage. Bodi seems like he could be fine with women but is ineffective, mostly psychologically. I don’t think I saw the squat or bench press mentioned anywhere.

Having and finding purpose is more nebulous, as you cannot typically find these at a gym (or a gym alone), but they are good for your psychological well-being as well as being attractive for women. Most males, if we don’t create any value at all, begin to feel malaise. Bodi seems to be convinced that he has rarely if ever created value, and the malaise is deep in his soul. He is predominantly fighting against himself.

Do you know those people who, when you ask them about their weekend, always say “it was good” “nothing much” “I watched some TV?” Do not be them. Ideally have specific actions. “I hosted a party” “I went on a date” “I set a new personal record in the gym” “I learned how to make a bookshelf at the local Home Depot.” Most people actually love to hear about learning new things (that they don’t have to master) and these kinds of hooks allow others to ask follow-up questions. Don’t be a bore and learn to gauge interest, but a guy who has some determination and who is active is more attractive than the opposite. Learn to tell stories around these activities, while soliciting her stories, if she has any. Many chicks are actually quite boring and have done nothing, so it pays to be prepared for that too.

Craftsmanship is learning to enjoy and compound small victories in any domain. It is the process of developing mastery over a skill. I don’t have much more to say about it, but you can read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values Paperback if you’d like some spiritual blather.

Bodi seems not to take pleasure in doing anything well. When this happens, it is both hard to do anything well and also hard to be contagiously interesting. I often talk, for example, on dates, about whatever meals I’ve been learning how to make, and that is an okay short date conversation. I will sometimes tell chicks to show me their knife skills (make them pantomime) and then “show” them the correct way to chop, which is a fine kino moment. I’m not saying you should do the same, but it is a true thing and one that interests chicks. Dinner is a common second/third date.

He seems not to be able to monetize his programming skills into consulting or running his own business… although I wrote the material you have already read before I read this in his book, “This is a lesson I learned and still hold in all aspects of my life. A long time ago I realised that lazing around doing nothing doesn’t make me happy; it makes me feel fidgety and low-value. Free time and relaxation is relative. It’s relative to the work that you do. The less free time you have, the more precious it is. Feeling good is caused by accomplishment and for accomplishment you have to work.” It’s f**king obvious and most people know it instinctively. Has no one ever told it to him? One problem with severe anti-social tendencies is that the guy doesn’t learn the obvious.

I also have had my struggles but nothing in the league of Bodi, so his book is a bit like reading about people born into third-world slums who have little ability to leverage their way out. He just doesn’t seem to be able to make his actions effective enough for him to leverage his way out.

Bodi should do standup, as his sad-sack stories are hilarious and can be made just misogynistic enough to be true but not so much as to alienate the audience. Standup stages are one of the few public arenas where sexual truths can still be uttered.

I have had anti-social tendencies, like you know, but they were balanced against athleticism. Strangely, being anti-social may have helped me deal with rejection more effectively when I was young and entertaining chicks -1 or -2 relative to me. But I was ahead of Bodi in other ways. He has intense fear, even nausea, on dates, has no idea what he’s doing wit chicks, etc. All feelings that were very familiar to me from ages 16 – 22-ish. Obviously I still get those feelings occasionally today, but I know how to squash them and soldier on. If you deeply believe that you are the prize and the chick will be lucky to get you, you have a different world than if you do not believe that. If you don’t, you have to fake it till you make it. Bodi goes through this much later in life but he does go through, which is good.

I believe this story starts at age 36, and, for Bodi, “Like me, in fact, the world scared Steve Jabba. Leaving his job and trying to forge a new life in a now threateningly Red-Pill world worried him and gave him anxiety.” This should worry him and give him anxiety. Careers have trajectories and if you f**k around being an unemployed pickup artist long enough you are likely going to f**k your career and earn real money. Earning real money is not something to be laughed at, as, if you need it, you might really need it. The people who earn large amounts of money usually develop their skills and networks over many years. While there are rare exceptions to this idea, the exceptions are just that, exceptions. Most people who spend years out of the labor market and network market permanently retard their ability to make money. That in turn is going to seriously retard your ability to have a family, assuming you want one eventually.

Most normal chicks also want a guy who they can tell a story about moving towards marriage and kids. Even chicks who will have a little fling cause you get them at the right time and right place. If you live a weird full-time player lifestyle you may be able to have short-term flings with those normal chicks, but you are not going to be able to retain them. Higher value and smarter chicks who want real boyfriends, or guys who they can tell real-boyfriend stories about, are not going to go for this.

Obviously a guy can shoot to be a pure player and forego long-term relationships, and he can shoot for chicks who are okay with this. Lord knows there’s a lifetime of those chicks out there, at least until the player ages out of them.

This is sort of like the male equivalent of a chick who spends all her energy on her appearance. A chick who spends all her energy on her appearance will find that she can be f**ked by some top guys, but the guys she wants the most aren’t going to wife her up. The better, smarter guys with good options are not going to take her seriously, because they don’t take f**kgirls seriously. Chicks with anything going for them are not going to take unemployed players seriously, and they shouldn’t. They might go for adventure with them.

My argument is NOT that guys should become basic corporate drones, wife up a fat chick, and move to the suburbs where she can live vicariously through reality TV, divorce her husband, and take up with a violent, emotionally unstable construction worker because she’s bored. But a guy who becomes an unemployed player is giving up a lot of value and that would worry me and make me anxious because I have the ability to plan for and think about the future.

As long as we are discussing anxieties I might as well let slip one of my own… Bodi says,

Nearly every man I’ve seen that’s exceeded 100 lays has become broken. They can no longer emotionally connect with women. Their circuits are fried from repeatedly going through the ‘attraction cycle’ with an excessive number of partners.

I have been wondering if I am emotionally broken and unable to connect properly. I am trying to break that pattern… and also sadly not doing as well as I should. I do not want to be one of those guys, people actually (women do it even more often) who is in the game until the moment he cannot effectively be in the game anymore. I don’t know what to do about this, to be honest. I have thought idly about trying those sex addict rehab type things, but they sound unbelievably horrible and, even worse, feminist. How many times can I tell some chick to bend over while I have a camera ready to snap? Do I still want to be doing this in ten years? I don’t think so and yet I find myself doing things that I know are bad for me long term.

Most people, including me, want a story in which their lives are meaningful, and I wonder if too much skirt chasing in itself prevents meaning formation. If skirt chasing is a result of some other activity, like being an artist or running a business, then it can be meaningful, but as an end goal in itself, can it? I genuinely don’t know the answer.

None of the players Bodi konws has a dog, or teaches anyone anything except for game. Family relationships seem tertiary at best.

Back to Bodi anxieties, “I could literally just poke my penis into a woman twice, withdraw then walk out and go home, ecstatic, and update my secret spreadsheet, reverentially.” Laughter. But is her serious? God, I hope he’s not serious. He might be serious. I don’t keep spreadsheets and that sort of thing… not opposed to them, but not for me.

It is also funny reading about people who are obsessed with the evils of socialism and who admire Ayn Rand characters, while simultaneously producing little of economic value themselves. No architects heroically struggling against aesthetic mediocrity in this bunch. Today, I wonder if any of them would try to become Pornhub amateurs as a depraved side gig.

Overall this book shouldn’t be fascinating yet it is, like watching a car crash in a porno or something similarly outlandish and yet compelling. There are also comments beyond the immediate, like,

PUA is a response to societal change. It was born out of Beta men suddenly finding that being able to provide no longer rewarded them with a pleasant, thin, subservient wife, like it previously did. Increasing socialism, feminism, immigration: all have weakened the SMV of Beta men. PUAs are at a unique position in history and sociology; they are a sociological phenomenon which is a response to a specific societal change

I don’t think most guys understand this yet. Or they understand, but accept their undersexed lot and the fat chicks surrounding them. But if you want a girl who is better than average, you have to be better than average yourself, or very lucky, or both. It is funny watching fat, or skinny-fat, or otherwise low-value guys who don’t understand why the hotter chicks are not knocking to get them. Bizarrely, many of the PUAs lower their value via video games, but that doesn’t seem to hurt them too much in short-term mating.

Bodi is a long description of mostly what not to do. He does take some action steps which are to be commended. Bodi did a bad course at university and does not seem to have corrected his path. He does seem high IQ because dummies cannot write as coherently as he does. It is a shame that Bodi does not harness his powers via e.g. standup comedy.

 

“Three Women” hamster, by Lisa Taddeo

Three Women Hamster” is a better title, and it’s a pretty Red Pill book… the upshot of the book’s story is that women don’t control themselves and aren’t really responsible for their actions (men are responsible for women’s actions, WTF?). Men are responsible for everything women do, including the things women want to deny, and are responsible for making women happy. It’s kinda fascinating to read a woman who is (inadvertently?) arguing that women are irresponsible, so what they say and do can’t be trusted. But that’s how a lot of women in real life present themselves… think about every time you’ve heard a woman argue that “it doesn’t count” for some reason or other. How the guys she dates are all dogs… “Do you ever hit on a guy overtly?” “No, ew, it’s the guy’s responsibility to make the first move.” Meaning, all the moves…

I embrace that fact, but many guys who have bought into the feminism fed to us by the public school system do not, yet then they wonder why they have sub-par sex lives. “Three Women” is about three chicks: one of them, Maggie, f**ks her high school teacher and then regrets it later. Another is living with her loser husband, loses a bunch of weight, and starts an affair. The last one is/was hot (she is in her 40s?) and her husband likes group sex and especially her f**king other men.

The first chick, Maggie, is the least interesting because she is straightforward: she f**ks her high school teacher, regrets it years later, and then tries to imprison him and ruin his life, then blames him for her own life going poorly. Extremely bad female behavior, but not atypical either. This is a woman who should read Ayn Rand and actualize her own life, but she won’t, not when there’s a man to blame and a government to demand handouts from. The second one, Lina, is a woman with a husband who won’t kiss her and has terrible sexual skills in general. Her story is also uninteresting because if you marry someone and won’t f**k them or be intimate with them, they’re going to go somewhere else for physical and emotional needs. And they should. If a man wrote a story about how his wife wouldn’t kiss him and would only have reluctant duty sex with him, all smart guys would tell him to leave her or have affairs. Same situation here. Red Pill guys like to focus on bad female behavior but frequently bad female behavior is a response to bad male behavior.

So the only interesting one is Sloane, the supposedly hot woman, and she has her first threesome, with another chick and her husband, and she likes it, but then she’s like,

Was it normal to like the rest, though? She couldn’t tell too many people. Perhaps, she reasoned, the people she couldn’t tell were the repressed ones and she was the healthy one. But none of the books she read and none of the television shows and films she enjoyed reflected that lifestyle.

If it doesn’t exist in the media and someone else hasn’t done it first, can it be done? Players learn that most women want to submit and be led, and most of the women in this book are typical of that tendency.

This is also why I think sex clubs are becoming more mainstream, as they’re being depicted with greater frequency in the media. I meant to link this sooner, but a dumb thing about the reality TV show The Hills talks about how two characters are now in an open thing,

There was a lot of talk about Brody’s “lifestyle,” which turned out to be code for what Stephanie called his “famous open marriage.”

In another, Mischa was chatting with Kaitlynn, who turned out to have her own beef with Ashley, after Ashley (apparently) said that Kaitlynn and Brody shouldn’t have kids because of their open marriage. “She needs to learn to mind her own business,” Kaitlynn said.

Now, I don’t give a f**k abou a Hills or anything reality-tv related, and neither should ANYONE reading this. It’s total garbage… TV is garbage and reality tv is the garbage of garbage. BUT, importantly, chicks are now seeing, via their preferred medium (pablum TV), depictions of open relationships. That was nowhere ten years ago, and, for the guy working sex clubs into his game repertoire, the path is getting easier. Most people and especially women need models to achieve anything, and now those models are more readily available for basic chicks. This may be bad for civilization but it’s good for players who want to f**k around a lot. We’ve decided, collectively, as a civilization, that individual self-fulfillment and pleasure are the highest and most important values that exist, higher than civilization itself, so we might as well behave accordingly (that’s what hot chicks do… what they do, not always what they say).

Later on in Three Hamsters, Sloane reads 50 Shades of Grey (so cliche) and then she’s cool with group sex. Since that book came out, lots of women have been writing about how it’s cool to cheat on men… something men should remember before they sign the marriage contract. Back to Sloane, her preferences are for “bad boys, bassists, dark messy types who rode motorcycles.” Standard Red Pill advice: “boredom = death.” If you bore a chick you will probably not retain her.

I don’t know why Sloane’s husband likes watching her f**k other guys, but for some reason he does, maybe because he eroticizes the competition. Seems weird to me but I have run into it before and am only too happy to enjoy the fruits.

A lot of guys also get the basics wrong… with some of them, Sloane says, they “stink.” It’s right there on page 218. Guys in the game often emphasize basics… lifting, approach, BASIC grooming, not letting the opportunity pass, having a clean or at least uncluttered apartment. Think of every chick you’ve heard say, “He’s cute, but a slob.” “I left because his sheets smelled.” Chicks are sensitive to these things and if you f**k them up, you will miss lays for no good reason. So many guys don’t shower, don’t use deodorant consistently, then they wonder why nothing’s happening for them. This is why RP guys talk endlessly about the basics, cause so many guys are not doing the basics right. If you don’t do the basics right, you cannot get to the advanced work. You cannot do calculus without algebra.

Naturally the guy she likes f**king best is already married, so then there’s some stupid drama related to that. Yawn. Red Pill knowledge makes a lot of narrative fiction and nonfiction less exciting, cause you can see the woman’s behavior patterns before she can… and you want her to think rationally instead of emotionally… but it doesn’t happen.

If you read “Three Women” Hamster, you will be swimming against a tide of tedious female rationalization and second-guessing, which is annoying enough to hear from a woman whose rationalization and over-thinking can be paid for via sex in real life but is just ridiculous in a book. A whole book of hamstering, which is instead billed as women’s deepest emotional thoughts, may be kind of boring, but it has moments and, if you wish to see the kind of endless emotional glop that goes on in a lot of women’s heads, this book is a look into it.

 

“The Key Logger” by Nicholas Jack

A reader sent me a copy of Nicholas Jack‘s book The Key Logger, a set of stories about the author’s spying and privacy violations. It’s akin to The Voyeur’s Motel, which is also relevant to human nature and especially the nature of women… topics much of society works hard to obscure. I myself don’t think I really “got it” until quite far into my life, and if not for some unexpected swerves I might still be in the dark.

This story from The Key Logger is about what a man sees when he leaves a computer with a keylogger installed on it open and available to women he dates. The results show many of them acting duplicitously, courting multiple men simultaneously, etc. To me, this book should remind guys that, when we are in doubt, we should go for it, as we never know when a woman’s situation will change or what she is really doing, as what she does is often very different from what she says she does. I am fond of keeping a list of “maybe” chicks who flame out or whatever and hitting them up every six to nine months. Often, their situation has changed or they are dissatisfied with their boyfriend, etc. I should say that I used to be fond of this practice but have been becoming less excited about it over time. “Snapchat in game” is a part of this kind of thinking/practice.

The bad news: the book is poorly edited and many sections are less developed than they should be. That is the nature of self-published books and for $8.99 on Kindle this one should be better or cheaper. My Secret Garden is probably a more immediately relevant book but this one reinforces what you will read in that one. But you will find much that is useful. The writer also notices things I have noticed:

We did another city tour on her scooter. It made me really understand why people love motorcycles. You are so shielded from the world when you are in a car, but on a motorcycle it feels like you are really there.

Most people excessively shield themselves from the world and live shittier lives as a result. I don’t know if motorcycles cause people to do less of that, or if people who do less of that choose to ride. I get the same feeling on a bike. Girls who don’t like cars are on average better than those who do. I have argued that men should “Ride an electric motorcycle—for fun, transport, and dating.” Used Zero Electric Motorcycles are widely available now. Electric Vespas are also now shipping and they are sexy as hell. Americans are too fat and too wrapped up in our big fat cars, then we wonder why we are disconnected from each other and miserable.

When a girl has a lot of options it’s very easy for her to use them if things get a little rough.

That’s simply true.

He also perceives that some women need a lot of attention from men, but that is partially an artifact of the women he’s dating. The women who don’t need constant attention aren’t dating around nearly as much. I do think women (and men) are very good at compartmentalizing when the need arises; women who are really good are probably not caught, or rarely caught.

This author, Nicholas Jack, is casually dating women who are casually dating him. Casually dating people often date multiple people. He seems to travel a lot for work, and that is detrimental to relationships. Men want sex and women want sex. If we can’t get it from one person, we seek it from another. He is discovering that women are human and also like sex. It is strange to me that our society works so hard and effectively to hide this fact.

He also runs into a girl who is cuckolding another guy; my guess is that their arrangement is consensual and she’s not actually trying to get pregnant, and they’re doing some kind of role play scenario. No guarantee that’s true.

This guy also likes normal clubs way more than I do.

The Key Logger could be seen as a long explanation for why I like consensual non-monogamy, as opposed to the de facto non-monogamy many people do. The girls this guy dates are already non-monogamous, so why not turn them into wingmen (wing women?) and go all the way? In my own life, I’ve been caring less about the game but it doesn’t seem to have affected results, at least so far.

There seem to be a lot of books that are okay but not where they should be, and some more effort would improve them. Quantity over quality sells? I was worried that I put too much effort into the sex clubs and players book, but it seems not.

Unfortunately, this book is far too short and poorly executed to highly recommend to most guys, but if you are looking for entertainment you can do worse. In addition, I wonder what would happen if a guy installed a key logger today and left a computer open in a prominent place. Would his results be similar to Nicholas Jack’s? I admire guys who gather data and run experiments, so I will encourage you do this and report back on the outcomes. I also encourage guys to write blogs because blogs are visible to search engines as well as places for a man to develop his own psychology. Twitter is ephemeral and a blog is more easily accessible to a wide array of guys.

I wonder if “Talking to Women” describes men today, too:

I have been reading a book, Talking to Women, published in 1965 and consisting of interviews with artsy Irish chicks. Many of their comments could be pulled from modern Red Pill writing. Let me take a look at some,

Sheila Rowbotham, in Promise of a Dream (2000), recalls how “little cultural space existed at this time for expressing the sexual freedoms emerging among young women of my generation. We were beginning to want relationships with men on quite new terms, yet were barely conscious of these needs.”

Today men have realized that marriage is foolish and that game is better than promising fidelity. Most women scorn fidelity except from the highest-status men, who are quite rare. It is much better to help women express their sexual freedoms and desires than it is to help women have children and a family. The whole society is set up to discourage children and family… yet many guys seem not to understand this. Yet. Despite the evidence all around them. Game writers are forging ahead and discovering fresh territory.

I suggest that men now offer relationships to women on quite new terms and I am part of that effort. No commitment, no little financial offerings, take-it-or-leave-it sex. Yet it turns out that most women do not like these terms so much as they might have thought. Especially at age 30+.

If these girls have anything in common it is a belief in personal fulfilment – that a woman’s life should not solely be the struggle to make men happy but more than that a progress towards the development of one’s body and soul.

If a woman believes that it is not her job to make you happy, then you should think the same of her (this is the vital principle of reciprocity that underlies human affairs). Yet women as a whole may be surprised when they find out that men as a whole take the same attitude towards them. That is not a good world to live in but it seems to be the one we are heading towards.

NELL Do you think it’s possible to stay with one man all your life?
PAULINE I think it’s possible.

What man wouldn’t sign up for marriage, with a ringing endorsement like Pauline’s?

NELL What do you think of the meaning of that expression ‘having a good time’ – what does ‘have a good time’ mean to you?
KATHY Well, going to parties and that sort of thing, mixing with people. Different people. Mostly all your friends, but then when you go to parties, there always is somebody different there. I like parties or going swimming and that sort of thing, sport, really. I get a lot of fun out of that, going out for the day and going swimming you know, a crowd of you, and having a drink and that type of thing.
NELL You prefer that really to a quiet life? A place and being in each night.
KAHTY Really, yes.

Don’t marry a Kathy. She was married for six years and divorced. A Kathy is for fun and sport, nothing more. Those kinds of girls have existed since forever. Many guys don’t understand that the Red Pill is not new. It’s quite old.

I have written extensively about non-monogamy, and here it is in 1965:

NELL Is sexual fidelity a hypocrisy that just doesn’t work?
FRANCES I’ve thought about it so much. There seem very few practical reasons for sexual fidelity in marriage – now there’s no danger of putting a cuckoo in the nest. And more than that, it’s a cumulative thing when the old laws break down, of people wishing to be independent, seeking desperately for their new identity.

Keep in mind however that these are artistic types for the most part, so they may not represent the body politic of women as a whole. Also, birth control is not 100% effective, even today, especially when it requires a daily pill, so that DNA testing is still wise. But Frances has a point, about how contraceptive technology and the curing of STIs weakens the need for monogamy. This is exciting to women who like having many partners and terrifying to women who want to try and lock down a top guy. He probably won’t be locked down as other women will give it to him, if he is attractive and has game. What I am doing is simply a logical extension of these basic principles.

They love f**king:

NELL How important do you think sex is?
ANTONIA It’s vastly important to me. If I’m frustrated I’m so incapable of doing anything. I feel unloved if I’m frustrated. I love making love so much, it’s one of the nicest things there is. And I so attach vast importance to it.

It’s strange to me when I read guys claim sex isn’t that vital to women. I think they just haven’t had enough experience. Or women show the side that the woman wants the guy to see. Women segment guys even more than guys segment women.

Lots of chicks have no idea what they want:

NELL Does the idea of freedom mean anything to you?
ANTONIA No, it doesn’t at all. Not at the moment. Living with Ben doesn’t, particularly. I’ve got as much freedom, more freedom than I want with Ben. I wish – this sort of business of personal freedom – I’d like him to be more possessive about me. Ont he other hand if I lived with someone who was more possessive, I’d hate it.

Chicks are incoherent and random. When I was younger I spent a lot of time trying to figure out why an individual chick had done some thing or not done some thing. Why did this chick say no to me? Why did this other, hotter chick f**k me like an animal almost immediately? There are patterns that are important for players to discern, but there is so much randomness.

The male desire algorithm is simple, as it calls for guys to f**k as many acceptable hot chicks as possible. The female desire algorithm is much more complex. Chicks often don’t know that they don’t know themselves. This chick, Antonia, acknowledges her own paradoxical nature, and even that is pretty random.

Guys need to be ready for the opportunities:

PADDY I think that some women they almost have to every now and then express themselves with some other man. They may not have work they’re particularly interested in and they’ve got all sorts of frustrations boiling inside them which they can only express by giving pleasure to another man. If they’re not a hundred per cent fulfilled by their own husband, what else can they do? And I can’t see that this is a sin at all.

No one is a hundred per cent fulfilled by their spouse. Paddy’s point, that a woman has to “express” herself “by giving pleasure to another man” is a key idea for guys: you should be ready to be that other guy. You should also not get married, as one day your lovely little wifey is going to want to express herself with another man. Though she not likely to express that to you first.

Almost all of the chicks in this book say sex is VERY IMPORTANT to them and in their relationships. If you sense a chick is uninterested in sex, chances are she is uninterested in sex with YOU and you should go find a chick who is interested in sex with you. A girl who is truly interested in sex with you and who gives no positive indicators is likely never going to be interested in sex with you, and you should quit wasting your time and go find a chick who is interested in you.

I think guys should read more material written by women; although much of it is self-serving and positioning pablum, some of it can be revealing.

The conversation has advanced much less than I would think. I don’t think most guys have a really strong sense of what women really like, think, and feel. Most guys have a sense of what women want men to think, not what women actually think. Most conventional movies and TV are designed to reinforce the lie, because the truth is too disturbing to the average person.

 

You are part of “The Revolt of The Public and the Crisis of Authority in the New Millennium”

If you are reading this, you are part of the revolt the public and the crisis of authority and therefore you should read this book so you better understand your own role in events. Anyone reading this blog is learning about ideas that are almost entirely absent from mainstream culture. You’re learning things that almost the entire educational edifice doesn’t want you to do (the big exceptions being 1. evolutionary biology departments in universities, 2. masculine sports coaches and some strength and conditioning coaches, and 3. the very rare, independent thinker who happens to work in education and stays under the radar). Taken together, the peer-to-peer information system is roiling the entirety of the developed world. People are learning things from each other that newspaper editors and other mainstream sources would NEVER put in front of readers’s eyes. Independent thinkers are able to put together ideas that wouldn’t be possible otherwise (and the importance of networked independent thinkers, those who form chains of knowledge, I address at the very end).

Martin Gurri is an impressive writer and I have not synthesized all of his insights. He understand, “Eventually the thought dawned on me that information wasn’t just raw material to exploit for analysis, but had a life and power of its own. Information had effects.” What happens if you learn that the dominant narratives are WRONG? In game terms, that means understanding that feminism is a lie (it’s not about equality (I support equality) but about special privileges), or that marriage makes men worse off? You pull one thread, and then a bunch of other threads come loose, and suddenly there is a bunch of bullshit that becomes obvious.

You read the Nassim Taleb books and learn that you are not the only one who is aware of bullshit.

You read evolutionary biology and realize that in today’s climate, monogamy is improbable. You realize that DNA testing should be mandatory at birth. You realize the state, as it presently exists, exists to extract resources from working men in order to give those resources to women.

You realize women are attracted to physical characteristics, which most of society underplays (except when it matters for money: Aquaman is popular among women and gay men).

Even if you don’t read evolutionary biology, you can read the books by Esther Perel, which target women, and realize that monogamy isn’t working. What do you do then? What do you do when you realize that your sweetheart, who pledges her undying love to you, will get bored of you in two or five or at most ten years, then use Facebook to stray?

You realize she loves her smartphone better than she will ever love you. If someone forced her to choose between her phone and you, she’d choose the phone. You realize she’s used her smartphone to send nudes many times.

You start to realize the civilization-enhancing lies that exist, that are woven throughout our lives.

You realize that anonymous advice by cads online is more useful for sex and dating than every movie you’ve ever seen or novel you’ve ever read. Why rely on the lie when you can mainline the truth? You realize that the amount of amateur porn out there reveals what women will happily do for men they’re attracted to, for men they perceive as superior in status to themselves.

You realize schools exist to enrich themselves. They’re still necessary for many people, but you become much more wary of them.

You realize you are just a consumer. You realize marketing is a lie. You realize chicks don’t care about the kind of car you drive, and that you should have spent one-third as much money on the car you now slave at a job you don’t like so you can afford that car. Why are you working the job you don’t even like instead of flirting with women and having sex? Why are you working the job instead of reading a book? You’ve never really asked yourself those questions.

Bloggers, and in general all dabblers in digital communications, are often accused of insulting sacred things: presidents, religion, property rights, even the prerogatives of a democratic majority. They speak when there should be silence, and utter what should never be said. They trample on the sanctities, in the judgment of the great hierarchical institutions which for a century and a half have controlled, from the top down, authoritatively, the content of every public discussion.

This is an excellent reason to write a blog: so you can insult sacred things like feminism and the feminine imperative, while helping other guys improve their game. I would probably not be writing this right not if not for Krauser in particular. Many other guys have written on the game but no one, to my knowledge, has done so at his level of depth. His racism is despicable but his knowledge and ability to convey his knowledge is great.

Game is useful because it has immediate practical applicability. Guys can and should go test it for themselves. No reason to take my word for it, or Krauser’s words, or the words of anyone in the side bar. Go try for yourself.

A third pattern [around the loss of traditional authority] would be the rise of alternative centers of authority. This is a corollary of the loss of monopoly. … Each vital community formed by amateurs interested in an affair becomes a threat to the authority of the institutions.

The best authorities for sleeping with hot chicks are not found in universities or the conventional media. They’re found online. Krauser, Nash, Yohami (if he ever gets a stable web presence) and a bunch of others are better authorities than all of literature, than any professor, than anyone writing for The New York Times or The Guardian. Even parts of Reddit are better for learning to have better sex with hotter chicks than traditional authorities. Alternative “centers” are rising, or have risen. There are other examples of this as well, but seeing as how I’m writing about f**king hot chicks, that’s the one I’ll focus on.

This is a great book for players, wannabe players, and anyone who looks at conventional culture, with its superficial “monogamy,” and thinks, “This shit is busted.” If you are writing online, you are part of the revolution. By historical standards, the revolution has happened fast.

This book, Revolt of the Public, reminds me of something written by the great Nassim Taleb:

It may be a banality that we need others for many things, but we need them far more than we realize, particularly for dignity and respect. Indeed, we have very few historical records of people who have achieved anything extraordinary without such peer validation—but we have the freedom to choose our peers. If we look at the history of ideas, we see schools of thought occasionally forming, producing unusual work unpopular outside the school. You hear about the Stoics, the Academic Skeptics, the Cynics, the Pyrrhonian Skeptics, the Essenes, the Surrealists, the Dadaists, the anarchists, the hippies, the fundamentalists. A school allows someone with unusual ideas with the remote possibility of a payoff to find company and create a microcosm from others.

It is almost impossible for someone operating totally alone to achieve as much as a small group working together. Peter Thiel says as much as well in his book about startup companies and the power of groups, Zero to One. The game writers are like a school or a small startup company, producing books, disseminating ideas, testing those ideas in the field, reporting back on which ones work. Early feminists didn’t realize that, in unshackling sex from marriage and reproduction, they also created the conditions necessary for pickup artists. Now, modern feminists are miserable harpies, living in a world their mothers and grandmothers created, failing to realize that, when high-status men refuse to marry, the meaning of their own lives would disappear. If feminists realized this, they’d be unhappy about it. Feminists don’t understand that normal women crave families and family life, yet feminists have succeeded in creating the legal and social conditions necessary to DESTROY family life.

Men have learned not to invest financially in women. A man should invest in himself, in his skills, in his gym, in his food (vegetables, nuts), in his nice boots, and NOT pour money into women, which is a way of turning off most modern women.

A man today with a $400 used laptop, discipline, and an Internet connection can change the world.

You are an important part of the game network and that is why I encourage you to write about your pickup and game adventures. You may disagree with me and I may disagree at times with you, but you are part of an underground movement that is important.

I am going to re-read this book.

“Sex Clubs, Non-Monogamy, and Game:” The free ebook

The free ebook Sex Clubs, Non-Monogamy, and Game is done and it is available for download as:

* A .mobi file for Kindle readers.
* A .epub file for other readers.
* A PDF, for anyone who wants to print a copy or read in some other manner.

paper version is here, on Amazon: I suspect most of you will read on Kindles, iPads, etc., but an easy paperback option is now available. I have also put up an Amazon ebook download, although I haven’t been able to get Amazon to give me a $0.00 price on the ebook version; Amazon will only offer $0.99, so that may have to remain.

The cover is pretty crappy and I made it in five minutes. If you’re a graphic person and want to make a better one, shoot it over and I’ll replace the cover in future editions. Magnum and others have suggested that I pay a couple hundred bucks to get an online freelancer to do a better cover, and they are probably right, but I’m just not willing to go that far for a free book that I’ve already spent way too much time on.

Please get in touch if you have ideas or responses. I view this book as a potential work in progress. I don’t think I’ve covered every aspect of the field, but I haven’t read any books that are as detailed and thorough as this one. The copy I’m releasing today, on 3 January 2019, can be seen as a refined beta release; if I get good feedback, I will put out another version in response to that feedback.

The book is being released under a Creative Commons 4.0 Attribution license. That means anyone can redistribute the book or edit it, provided that your version attributes the original to “The Red Quest.” I have gone back and forth about whether I should make this book free or paid. A free book is more easily available, but most people value a thing at its price: “free” things are usually worth what’s paid for them. I hope Sex Clubs, Non-Monogamy, and Game is the exception to that principle.

There are other free books discussing the floating around, with The Book of Pook being the best-known. I just read it. I hope Sex Clubs, Non-Monogamy, and Game will be passed from player to player, without restriction, and that guys learn to be guys and learn how to live their possible lives. Please email copies of the book to whoever you think may want to read it.

The book is dedicated to Nash and to everyone who has ever taught me about the game. The first version of the book was about 31,000 words, and this version is about 42,000 words, the majority of those words in response to initial reader feedback.

The Tom Torero lay report book, “Below the Belt”

If you’re interested in Torero and have never read his books, start with Daygame, or his textbook (I can’t find the name of it now). Below the Belt is a series of lay reports and it’s fine: it does what it promises for guys who jones for more lay reports. At least a few of these have appeared in other forms, including some in Daygame. It’s strange for me to read them, as I’ve read some of Nick Krauser’s books, and I know enough about the background between Krauser and Torero to find Krauser’s absense notable. There seems to be some narcissism of small differences between them… they are similar in so many ways… yet some obscure-seeming beef separates them. Like Nabakov and Edmund Wilson having a falling out. I find whitewashing the past like that to be odd, regardless of what precipitated the split. I would rather learn about the tensions between them. There is a deep literature on creative partnerships:

In his book “Collaborative Circles: Friendship Dynamics and Creative Work,” from 2001, the sociologist Michael P. Farrell made a study of close creative groups—the French Impressionists, Sigmund Freud and his contemporaries. “Most of the fragile insights that laid the foundation of a new vision emerged not when the whole group was together, and not when members worked alone, but when they collaborated and responded to one another in pairs,” he wrote. It took Monet and Renoir, working side by side in the summer of 1869, to develop the style that became Impressionism; during the six-year collaboration that gave rise to Cubism, Pablo Picasso and Georges Braque would often sign only the backs of their canvases, to obscure which of them had completed each painting. (“A canvas was not finished until both of us felt it was,” Picasso later recalled.) In “Powers of Two: Finding the Essence of Innovation in Creative Pairs,” the writer Joshua Wolf Shenk quotes from a 1971 interview in which John Lennon explained that either he or Paul McCartney would “write the good bit, the part that was easy, like ‘I read the news today’ or whatever it was.” One of them would get stuck until the other arrived—then, Lennon said, “I would sing half, and he would be inspired to write the next bit and vice versa.” Everyone falls into creative ruts, but two people rarely do so at the same time.

It would seem that Torero has had several of these partnerships, with Antony (who is mentioned) and Krauser (who is not). If you want the negative take, Nash has you covered. I don’t have a strong view on the issue. I’m also in a different world, as my entire life doesn’t revolve around seduction or writing books and other products teaching it.

The Torero lay reports are valuable, and I don’t have a lot ot add to their value. Game reports reinforce how flakey and random girls are. A girl can be DTF one night, then ghost the next. Most guys don’t appreciate the randomness of girls, and more guys should.

Overall these stories seem like they match my own experiences, and that is nice. If we’re all having somewhat similar outcomes, then the system mostly works, probably mostly for the reasons worked out by guys who know evolutionary biology and create game systems that incorporate the results from it.

I like this:

In this book I’ve also made a conscious decision to document the darker sides of the player lifestyle, from rejections and dry spells to runaway egos and fuck ups. If you want to be a member of the Secret Society and get lots of casual sex without the romance then there’s a price to be paid, even if it’s not initially obvious.

Some guys writing about the game are either very young (in which case their life is all about the game and banging new chicks, as it should be) or underestimate the dark sides. I think there are still darker sides than we get here. The ego protection mechanism is still at work.

I vehemently disagree with this:

A long-term PUA has to be selfish, by default. He doesn’t settle down in one place or with one girl. He goes for what he wants and perfects how to get it. Learning the pickup skill set is exactly that: improving your frame, standing up for what you want, not being the Nice Guy doormat. The same techniques that work with gaming girls (breaking rapport, qualifying, leading, dominance) spill over into all your interactions. It’s not only girls that start calling you an asshole and a jerk.

A long-term PUA does NOT have to be selfish. Good PUAs create “win-win” situations. Chicks want to be seduced and wish more guys would learn how to seduce them well. A guy who seduces a chick is not being selfish. Especially if he does not hide that he’s a casual sex guy. A guy who sets the relationship frame appropriately is creating value in the world. A guy who pretends he might marry a girl and then jilts her… he is being a selfish asshole. I think chicks can sense that I have a generative spirit, despite my non-monogamous ways, and I think that helps me out. “Generative spirit” does not mean I’m a “nice guy” (I’m not), but I also try to make the world a better place. I genuinely think game does make the world better, because it teaches guys the skills chicks already wish guys had. I’ve been told that it’s nice to be asked out in public, by a guy, in person. Even chicks who say “no” or “I have a boyfriend” have said that. There is a problem with masculinity in the United States and maybe the world in general. Game is part of the solution (a topic for another post, maybe, although it will be a rambling, philosophical one).

“A long-term PUA has to be selfish, by default” tells us about the writer, not about the world. It is true that chicks will project eventual monogamy and domesticity onto the player. I have had that happen (although some of my interests in group sex retard the chick’s projections).

“The loud, cocky confidence which attracts girls is abrasive when you’re dealing with it 24/7.” Yes. I have met these guys.

She said that I was the third guy she’d ever had sex with (the first two were long term relationships) and the first guy who’d not bought her expensive shit. She also said she liked the direct way I stopped her on the street and that she knew I wanted to fuck from the start. Good feedback for a player, I’d felt my frame improving since daygaming Russians.

The thing about gifts is very similar to what Ms. Slav told me. That said, if you are trying to keep a girl around for the medium term, gifts can help a guy pass comfort tests. There are no comfort tests mentioned in this book, or if there were I missed them. A girl only loves gifts if she’s earned them. If she hasn’t earned them, a gift is a demonstration of lower value. Guys mistakenly see chicks go ape shit for gifts in movies and TV shows but forget that movies and TV shows are fiction, often catering to women who love the idea of an already high value guy giving them gifts.

If you ask a chick, “Do you like gifts from guys?” they say, “YES,” because they are imagining it coming from a hot, high-value guy. In which case a gift is very good. From a low-value guy, it can be okay but kind of icky.

After the lay we reclined on the bed and I asked her my typical post-sex questions (you’ve got a short window after the notch to get a girl to spit some truth from her hindbrain before her forebrain guards take over again).

I’ve also seen this. Right after sex is the best time to talk to chicks.

A weakness of writing books of just lay reports (like my first book in particular) is that once you work out how to have casual sex, the infield reports start to sound robotic as you get less and less learning points and levelling up in each one. The puzzle’s been solved, the hustle has become consistent, so why keep writing? Is sex just sex at the end of the day?

I have been thinking about more stories from my past, but many of them are not that interesting. Particularly the girls I’ve met online.

Some chicks are also attracted to players:

Finally she found out about my double life and my Tom Torero brand (I’m not sure how, but who cares). After a little bit of coldness she was increasingly turned on by the idea of me fucking lots of other girls for my job.

In a later story, Torero talks about dating a woman for a year and breaking up with her because she wanted a deeper relationship and perhaps a family. I would’ve liked to hear more about this. That may fit my own pattern of a larger number of short and medium term relationships, as opposed to a large number of one-night stands and ultra-causal encounters. If I like a chick, I try to keep her on rotation (non-monogamy can help with that). A guy who loves the one-night stand ought to do the one-night stands, and some girls want ultra-casual sex or decide they don’t like the guy after he takes her for a ride.

In my experience, it’s also rare for the first-time sex to be the best sex, so there is that aspect for me. Usually it takes three to five sessions to hit the peaks. Many guys who Yohami would call “bottom guys” think of consensual non-monogamy as a beta move that allows the girl to get strange dick while the guy sits at home playing video games. For guys with options, and guys who like a chick to stick around, the big problem can be retaining her in the medium term.

Should you read it? I dunno. If you want more lay reports, then sure. If you’ve already read a bunch of them, as I have, then I don’t know if it’s that useful. They do get repetitive, and that sense of repetition may be part of what’s making me thinking about the next part of my life. I have a kind of sense of having seen it, done it, it’s not as satisfying as it was, what’s next?