“Good Men Aren’t Getting Harder to Find”

Good Men Aren’t Getting Harder to Find.

For most women.

The problem comes from the kinds of 35-year-old women who write those articles about how hard it is to find a “good” man, meaning he is over 6′, makes $100K or more per year, looks good, works out, looks good naked, is great socially, is great in bed, and wants to wife up older women.

These women are disproportionately likely to have attended schools that inculcate their own sense of specialness in the world. They live in big cities that favor players not providers.

They are women who think that men think like women… that men are attracted to money, wealth, and status, rather than things like looks, kindness, and caring. Today, smart men looking for a long-term partner should look at a woman’s job situation… a woman out of school who has no work or work history whatever is probably showing that there is something wrong with her… but a woman in a corporate job is not that appealing to most similarly situated men. When I am evaluating women for long term situations, two jobs in particular stand out, teacher and nurse. They are both jobs that are easy to leave at the job (don’t demand 50+ hour weeks) and they are both jobs that make it easy to leave for a year or two to have a family.

There are a lot of women who bring nothing to relationships apart from their p***ies… and then they are surprised… where are the GOOD men?

Her career is not that significant an asset, either.

Top men… are often looking at women in their mid to late 20s for family… not so much women in their mid 30s, who are rapidly approaching infertility.

I think there is a class of delusional women who spent their reproductive time in school and low-level media jobs, who can’t figure out why they’re still on the shelf, who are complaining about the “good men” shortage… I am complaining about the shortage of hot 22 year olds who are height-weight proportionate and want to bend over for me… what a surprise. Women have also not been taught in their bullshit schools that men and women value similar but slightly different things in long-term relationships, so if you don’t bring what men most want… you are going to get what you get.

Delusional women and rejected men also have political ramifications… this is a great work, one that I will say more about later. I think we are really seeing a crisis of delusion, increased by social media, porn, etc. People who raise their value and see past their delusion, they are okay. A lot of women… are not doing this… then they wonder where the “good” men are… the good men are having children with younger women, women who want relationships and families… or the good men are having a wild ride, cause women value sex appeal over stability.

*Sex and the City* and the woman’s age

Spinster Candace Bushnell, the woman who wrote the original *Sex and the City* book and then created the famous TV show, is now in her 50s and has written a book about how being single and childless at that age sucks for chicks… most of you readers already know this, of course, because older women are competing for a pool of guys who would rather date women in their 20s or 30s, if possible.

Let’s not reiterate that again, instead I will observe that I am of the age in which pretty much every high school and college girl I knew watched the show when it came out and watched it again on DVD (before streaming was common, many movies and TV shows shipped on plastic discs that had to be purchased one-by-one, for you young guys reading this). Younger chicks perceived it as very glamorous. I also read the *Sex and the City* book way back when and watched most of the show, here and there, usually w/ chicks. I think the key to a chick’s interpretation of either is how old the chick is. For teen girls and girls up to the late 20s (perhaps 28/29), the show reads as glamorous f**king around in the city and being serenaded/seduced by a wild variety of hot hot men who are going to pick up the tabs for fancy dinners, whisk them around to clubs, etc. The shiny fantasy rules.

For women over age 28/29, *Sex and the City* starts to look like the “cock carousel” much-discussed online by men… older women see the guys in the show are getting copiously laid while offering the women a minimum of commitment, and female-female competition is fierce and relentless. NYC is expensive and, in the real world, it’s very hard for most women to make enough money to have a reasonable standard of living in the city without a guy to subsidize her. But a lot of the guys want to play the field and will not subsidize her. Older women detect underlying sadness in the show, but most younger women don’t detect the underlying sadness until it’s too late.

A lot of women feel like they have to viciously compete in NYC due to male/female ratios that favor men. That’s the thing the city still has most going for it, for players. Many women don’t read enough and don’t understand why NYC is a different market than most cities in the rest of the country.

Older women can accept that NYC is hard, choose a guy she perceives as “lesser,” or go poly, or just fuck around and accept that they’re not going to have kids, which will make them bitter and alone when older. Most women want kids, though, and can’t be happy without a family. Thus the neuroticism and deep unhappiness of single women over age 35. Such women are dangerous as bosses, I want to add.

The *Sex and the City* TV show’s undercurrent of hysteria is because most of the women are over 30 and know time is not on their side. The show is similar except that there is an unrealistic deus ex machina for Carrie at the very end. But if you watch the show carefully, you’ll be aware that most of the women in it are not very happy because they know they are living their lives poorly.

I also think many chicks have a dangerous precedent because they get enormous sexual market power (SMV) very early, as teens (provided they are not fat), and can fairly easily maintain that SMV power for fifteen years just by not being fat. Today, chicks using online dating can feel the incredible SMV power of their youth even more keenly than chicks before online dating. The decline in SMV can be rapid, however, leaving many women psychologically wounded because what was “easy” for them has suddenly become hard. The same thing happens to a few guys, like the high school athletes gone to seed who had high SMV and see it drop. More common is the guy who sees his SMV rise as he works on his body, mind, and income throughout his 20s and 30s.

Candace Bushnell was probably warned about her shelf life but decided that hot short-term sex is better than having a family, particularly a family with a low-status male.

The writer of the article that got me started on this piece is a feminist, yet she also notices, “Then I read some of the original Observer pieces, which were tough and unsentimental, even caustic.” That is also my reading, because even then Bushnell was in her 30s competing for cool guys who really want chicks in their 20s. Bushnell and her friends discover what lots of women do. The feminist writer says of the new Bushnell, “The book captures the buoyancy of the writer’s brand, but it also has a weather-beaten, mellow quality. If the women in ‘Sex and the City’ were living the dream, these characters are trailing after, reminiscing about, sometimes questioning it.” The women in *Sex and the City* were never living their dream, except for promiscuous Samantha, as their true dream is having a wealthy cool guy and having a family with that man. Something none of them were on the path to doing because they were too busy f**king hot guys. Lesson for guys is simple, be the hott guy. This lesson has been well-learned and now many women complain of “players.” Players exist because women prefer hot fun-loving guys to boring reliable provider guys. Even provider guys are figuring out that there is little benefit to being a provider guy and a lot of benefit to hitting the gym and being a party, hot-sex guy. I don’t think every guy has what it takes to be a party hot-sex guy but many do.

Women in many big cities and upper-middle-class households are socialized to chase the job and career, like men. Then women discover as they get older that those things are less satisfying than having a family, but they are not going to drop their socialized acceptance of the lame careers they have as middle managers.

That article has lots of bullshit in it, such as talk of “how our ideas of masculinity and femininity have shifted” between 1997 and today. They haven’t much. Yes, among some gender freaks in Brooklyn there are loser androgenes, but very few hot chicks will deliberately make themselves less hot and very few top guys will deliberately make themselves more feminized. There is more gender confusion, with fat chicks leading the way, but on the whole masculinity remains and guys who want a good sex life cultivate their masculinity, and women who want top guys cultivate their femininity.

Today of course the Internet helps guys learn the game and helps people interested in sexual depravity like myself discover others interested in sexual depravity. So I do believe that weird sex practices are increasingly prevalent, and players who don’t slut-shame women and who lift weights will have much greater access to those practices.

I am thinking about next life steps because I don’t want to be the equivalent of a 35-year-old woman who has f**ked her best years and highest value away and is struggling to set up what she wants to do next… a very common pattern that players age 30+ are familiar with. I wonder how many guys would also be better off moving to the midwest, where family is more valued, when they/we are less excited about chasing random chicks (guys under age 30 can ignore this statement). Many people also see their life priorities change when their parents or other family age or die… that can be a jarring reminder that life is finite and some of our choices preclude us from pursuing particular paths. At age 20 it is easy to think you will be young forever and that your family will be the same forever… you will not and they will not.

I don’t get the sense that lots of younger chicks still watch the show but I have run into a few who have, often at early ages (11, 12, 13… I meet them when they are much older I want to add!).

Overall, *Sex and the City* reaffirms that chicks want to be seduced by hot guys. That is what all their fantasies are about, in TV or in fiction, and men can learn how to seduce and be seductive.

Boredom = death

Boredom = death, when it comes to chicks that is. This chick is f**king some guy who is nice but boring, “We had sex. He’s always very tender. It’s always slow and nice. I can come easily, so I always orgasm, but I can’t say it’s from his moves, which are pretty green.” Plus, he’s weak, if you translate from chick-speak, “He’s just so kind and thoughtful. Which brings me to my one hesitation about Ben … Sometimes I worry I’m not excited enough by him.”

This guy needs to both up his game and find a chick with slightly lower SMV. The woman just broke up with a doctor she names Drew, “When Drew and I were together, we would go away most weekends. I was always dying to be with him. Like, panting for him. With Ben, it couldn’t be more opposite. I feel Zen. I wouldn’t call it ‘blah’; it’s more like calm.” She knows her SMV is at risk from aging, “He was a resident, and she was one of the nurses. This happened a year ago, when I turned 30. It killed me. It still kills me. Sometimes at work I look at his Instagram page and try to analyze it. Is he with the nurse?”, but she doesn’t act that way. Probably his nurse is a little younger and also more economically functional.

The chick in the story is probably not a good earner, “Work was tedious. I had to present a bunch of new products to the owner of the shop, who is nice but intense. She had a lot of questions. I was not my best self. Get me home to bed!”, and “Drew” knows it. I have said this in various places, but when it comes to long-term relationships, the chick’s qualities aside from “hot” and “willing” become important. The chick in the story doesn’t seem like she has much of anything that contributes to the household apart from her p***y. That’s fine for short-term, but for a lot of guys p***y is, if not a commodity, then available, and character, earning, cooking, etc. are not. Guys look for “full package,” and “Drew” was either bored of her, or looking at a more functional woman, or could be both.

It’s strange to me that more women are not working to move themselves out of the “commodity p***y” and into the “special girl” category.

Lesson for guys is simple, don’t be f**king boring, and if you are, a lot of chicks who are on the younger and hotter side of things will next you.

 

Truths rarely admitted: “There’s nothing more powerful in our culture than a beautiful woman”

Truths rarely admitted: “There’s nothing more powerful in our culture than a beautiful woman.” But it’s coming from a gay guy, and gay guys, like comedians, can utter truths the rest of us will face a PC pillory for stating. Most gay guys aren’t PC; they know sexual market value (SMW) too well to be PC. Most PC people will admit dark truths if they’re stated correctly.

But there is more context

He said he feels enormous empathy for women who get frightened about their looks fading. “There’s nothing more powerful in our culture than a beautiful woman,” he said. But “it’s an unsustainable thing. One day it stops. And I have lived through it with so many female friends and part of my job is to imagine myself, the female version of myself, would I want to wear that? Where would I go in it? How would I feel in it? Would I feel vulnerable?”(Mr. Ford said if he were a woman, he would be Ali MacGraw.)

It is unsustainable. It fades fast. We name it “the wall” but you can name it whatever you want to name it. I feel bad for some of these women too… they might understand intellectually that it’s coming, but they don’t prepare for it and one day it BOOM hits them. A lot of guys online are pretty gleeful about that but I don’t share their glee, as beauty is only slightly less fleeting than life itself.

Annoyingly, we don’t get a link to the t-shirt mentioned

He used to tailor white T-shirts he bought at La Rinascente in Milan, but now he wears his own brand. “The cut of the sleeve has to be just right if you want your biceps to look right,” he said.

I did look around the Tom Ford website and clothes there are stupid expensive. Part of combining “Fashion and clothes for players” with Mr. Money Mustache is not spending stupid amounts of money on clothes. I still want to understand the cut of the sleeve thing.

Most fashion guys understand that the human social effect comes from successful attention to numerous details. Players who aren’t naturals eventually learn the same.

Funny, but evil

I was on Facebook (a mistake) and read one of those horrible rants by a “male feminist” saying that we should “believe all women,” and I got an idea: every male feminist who writes that all women should be believed, etc. should have an anonymous denunciation of him posted online. Then it should be circulated, particularly at his workplace.

If this is done routinely, we’ll quickly get rid of all the male feminists who say things like, “If you’re not guilty, you have nothing to hide.”

Players know about the concept of the misguided “white knight.” This could be a form of “black knighting.”

You cannot fight the current level of feminist irrationality regarding anonymous denunciation with rational argument (although maybe there are a few green shoots). When virtually every guy who is a male feminist b***h has an anonymous accusation out there, against him, we might see the value of those denunciations fall.

I have seriously thought about doing this with one guy in particular. The fact that it is evil stops me. The fact that he is a b***h tempts me. I am not advocating that this be done. But as a thought experiment it is interesting, right?

Truthfulness, reality, politics, the Red Pill

This is another garbage politics essay, so you might as well go read the Ms. Slav saga, which is much more interesting and features a bunch of hot sex too. Plus girl management, which I may be doing somewhat poorly in her case. Also, no one has the attention to read and think about anything in depth, including this missive, which is why politics look like they do. That is not an endorsement of your side, by the way.

A commenter addressed a side note stashed into another post,

“It’s weird and incongruent to be interested in truthfulness and reality while at the same time admiring one of the greatest grifters in U.S. history.”

Thank you for this. One of the things that drives me absolutely nuts about TRP is the insane and completely irrational devotion to conservatism and [well-known political figure] in particular. You’re spot on: it’s 100% incongruent.

TRP, boiled down to its essence, is about the rational application of power and action to improve a man’s life with specific regard to his sex life, understanding the world, not as we’re told or want it to be, but how it actually is in reality.

I wrote a post on the reddit sub the other day I eventually just decided to take down about why guys shouldn’t be so freaked out about feminism and to focus on the signal vs. the noise–as in, how to discern if a woman actually is actually a crazy, man-hating feminist, or if she’s merely someone who nods to the notion but doesn’t actually care. TL;DR–most women, in my experience, don’t actually give a shit, and in fact want alpha Chads with a dominant frame because #evolution.

The reaction I got was no upvotes and guys questioning whether or not I was a woman. I don’t really care–simply trying to contribute, but what I’ve found is that if you go against the orthodoxy in any way, dudes get super defensive.

I’ve been thinking about this and have concluded a couple things, including that a) most people want to divide themselves into tribes and then go whack the other tribe over the head with sticks, and b) politics is one of these areas, like religion or philosophy, where belief is almost totally removed from and segregated from consequences. If you have made game or low masculine value, chicks won’t f**k you. I also think most guys are more apolitical than conservative, but if you post typical us-vs-them political things, people get riled up and have to stick their oar in. Politics is the noisy screaming in the street, with people rushing to see the fight, while thinking happens with the guy sitting in the coffee shop, reading a book and thinking about the book while 100 people stream past him towards the square.

There are some other things going on too…

1. The crazy social justice warrior and angry feminist left is legitimately awful. So guys think, “What is the opposite of that? Let me go do that instead.” No one thinks about things for themselves. Most people select either|or, instead of looking for third ways, or simply saying, “Neither.” If SJWs are on the left, then I must be on the right, right? Errrrrr… no… but that is how the typical person thinks.

2. Most people want a “system” to follow. Religion used to provide this. Today, religion is mostly dead, and so guys find politics instead. Once a typical person buys into a political party or system, they stay with that system, even when it is bad, or has bad outcomes. It’s useful to think to yourself, “If I didn’t know the source of quote x, and it came from a guy on the other side instead of the guy on my side, what would I think of it?” This goes back to politics as a team sport instead of independent thinkers.

3. Keep in mind that TRP and seduction probably selects for guys who have been unsuccessful with or hurt by women. Probably guys with bad childhoods too. Guys who are getting what they want from dating, women, etc. are probably not spending a lot of time debating pickup tactics online or getting super angry about politics they barely affect.

4. It turns out that the core elements of game and pickup, while not exactly “easy,” can be mastered and, once mastered… there is not a gigantic amount to say. Thus lay reports becoming kind of repetitive. Once a guy is getting laid, what else can he talk about… how feminism sucks, or politics? Then that attracts other guys.

5. Certain current U.S. political leaders are doing serious, long-term damage to the American system itself and to the right/Republican party. This is not coming from a leftist or SJW, by the way. That nihilistic trolls might embrace him, makes sense. That anyone who is not a nihilistic troll might, makes no sense, but who said the world had to make sense?

Not me.

Unfortunately, “The Twitter Takeover of Politics Is Just Getting Started.” The level of political thinking of Red Pill / player guys is barely better than the SJWs and leftists who have become The Great Satan. Everyone is looking to hit the other team on the head with rhetorical sticks, while the other team is looking to hit “us” on the head with sticks. The clearest manifestation of this is the bizarre glee about the grifter who is presently on top of the United States’s Executive Branch.

At the same time, most people’s political knowledge is abysmal. Don’t take my word on this, read The Myth of the Rational Voter instead. In fact if you have not read this book, go read it before you consider commenting on this essay. That you probably won’t, is indicative of the problem.

To quote myself, “Markets are beautiful because they separate the lies people say (meaning, most of what people say) from what people actually want.” Politics have attenuated markets of sort in the form of voting, which is better than nothing, but it’s still pretty crappy. People are very insulated from their decisions. If you make bad game and life decisions you will not f**k hot chicks. Bad political decisions take a long time to propagate (remember that Chavez was initially legitimately elected in Venezuela, for example, and Nixon was legitimately elected in the United States). So people use politics as a signaling mechanism and are rather insulated from most political decisions. The kinds of people who take to Twitter to be SJWs on the left, then get image-matched by people who take to Twitter to be right-wing trolls and agitators on the right.

You may also notice that, in any forum devoted to a topic with good feedback loops, a political discussion descends into idiocy. Game and RP is no different. With game, the feedback loop is short and clear. A guy who improves his game knowledge, sees changes quickly. In politics, the feedback loop isn’t there; a guy who improves his political knowledge… sees nothing change. He may vote a little bit differently but still suffers from the myths of the irrational voters, mentioned above. The historical knowledge isn’t there. Neither is the incentive to improve. The market quality isn’t there. Voters are attenuated from individual decisions, and guys writing online about politics are also attenuated.

You put all these effect together and you get guys spouting “conservative” “Red Pill” slogans. No one can get past their identity to look at the data, to quote myself again. People who can do that, who can think in terms of systems, who can process past events and see how they might be able to apply to the future… those people are rare. People who can parrot back identity-bashing slogans… they are common. Including in the Red Pill.

Most RP/seduction guys have failed at normal dating, are too low status to achieve their desires in normal dating, or are otherwise dissatisfied with what they’re getting. Often, they’ve never learned what women are actually attracted to, or how to be attractive to women. Then they think, “If that is a lie, what else is a lie?” Thus, the spread to politics.

Now that you understand why RP guys can get taken in by marketing grifters and confidence men, can you can vote appropriately, or work on building your business, or go hit on chicks instead of screaming about politics online.

Today, the real question is about how the liberal west is going to respond to the rise of China. Neither the grifter in the White House nor Britain obsessed with Brexit is even thinking about, let alone dealing with, this issue. We squabble, they work. Think about that.

“The Woman Worried She’ll Never Meet Her Polyamorous Boyfriend’s Parents”

The Woman Worried She’ll Never Meet Her Polyamorous Boyfriend’s Parents” might be an example of a guy doing polyamory from the superior position. He’s f**king at least two women. The one writing the story is deeply into him. She seems to be retained without too much work on his end. Without the polyamorous frame, she would probably not be f**king him as regularly or easily.

I don’t want to make too much of this story because, without knowing more about the looks of everyone involved, and other aspects of the guy’s situation, he could be acting from a pretty inferior position. Based on the information provided, though, he seems to have at least two chicks well inside his frame.

More women are being psychologically prepped for open relationships by articles like this. Guys should be considering whether they want to present this kind of frame.