Krauser’s post “Reveal vs. Restructure” is the most important post about beginner mental state that I’ve ever read.
In “where spinsters come from” series, this woman, who is already 32, gets a good place
Being single the past couple of years has made it easy for me to make decisions like picking up and moving to Europe. I enjoy the thrill of sleeping with someone new and I think more is more when it comes to sexual partners. That said, I would love to get married at some point in the next few years. But right now, I at least would like to form some genuine connections.
Packing up and moving to a foreign country, likely temporarily, is an awful place to develop the social structure and social life that encourages marriage. F**king randoms is great, and I’ve done it a lot, but it’s also terrible prep for marriage, particularly for women. This woman has already passed her peak fertility level and thinks that some guy is going to come along to wife her up the day she’s finally ready. Who knows, maybe some guy will (there are plenty of guys who will do dumb sh*t), but reading this is like watching a guy claim he’s serious about getting in the game while he stuffs Doritos in his mouth and picks up the gaming system controller. Actions and stated beliefs/desires are very different.
It’s kinda sad seeing delusion in action but it’s also informative. She sounds like a right good time though. Guys who are interested in monogamy also have to remember that they’re pushing against every female-centric clickbait website in the world that’s pushing a “you go girl” and “f**k around” narrative.
Another super sad spinster story. “The cat years” is depressing… looking at the dark side of life is important… for women, not having a family sets them up for a life that is composed more of misery and missed opportunities than for joy… yet younger women are systematically misled. I have some compassion and pity for spinsters… they messed up and they are an example to other women of what not to do.
As well as sending our brains into social overdrive, research also shows that eye contact shapes our perception of the other person who meets our gaze. For instance, we generally perceive people who make more eye contact to be more intelligent, more conscientious and sincere (in Western cultures, at least), and we become more inclined to believe what they say.
Of course, too much eye contact can also make us uncomfortable – and people who stare without letting go can come across as creepy. In one study conducted at a science museum, psychologists recently tried to establish the preferred length of eye contact. They concluded that, on average, it is three seconds long (and no one preferred gazes that lasted longer than nine seconds).
Players practice it. Chicks respond to it.
Another documented effect of mutual gaze may help explain why that moment of eye contact across a room can sometimes feel so compelling. A recent study found that mutual gaze leads to a kind of partial melding of the self and other: we rate strangers with whom we’ve made eye contact as more similar to us, in terms of their personality and appearance
If she holds your eyes for those three seconds, go talk to her immediately. This chick is an example of eye contact’s power.
“The hilarious part was that after we f**ked, she says: ‘GOD it feels so good to get picked up.’”
I have gotten this kind of response too. Sometimes chicks will yield horrible blowouts or just look at you like you’re a bug, but more often the responses will be positive, and sometimes they will be ecstatic, like this chick. Remember that most chicks are passive and will not do much but try to look good and react to the man’s actions.
Even many girls in relationships will be flattered when you hit on them. Most guys today are glued to their phones and have become social idiots. Be different.
“I Thought I Wanted to Go It Alone.” Narrator: “She did not.” No one really wants to go it alone… everyone wants to go it with someone like +2 SMV… and if that cannot be achieved… then it’s time to “go it alone” as a pose. Humans are social beings and almost none of us really want to go it alone. When someone says they want to go it alone, male or female, they are almost always posturing. This woman has the usual delusional woman problems, “What broke my state? A few things, really. I passed 35 and wanted a baby. I fell in love and was mercilessly dumped.” Of course she wanted a baby, no one gives a f**k about their career accomplishments compared with their family networks… goes triply for chicks. Somehow almost no one among professional women circles talks honestly about this. “Your Professional Decline Is Coming (Much) Sooner Than You Think.” For chicks it’s worse, cause their SMV decline starts around age 30 and accelerates around 35.
I should stop posting this kind of shit… there’s so much of it… yet delusion is kind of fascinating… I think the best players understand delusion pretty well.
Andy from “Kill the Inner Loser” has an interesting site & story. He got started on Good Looking Loser then moved to do his own thing. Hadn’t heard of him before Yoylo shot me a link. His posting of “proof” pics is audacious and also seems a little… risky… to me, and I’ve done some dumb shit in pursuit of and inside of p***y.
“Open marriage considerations” is a post by Rakish Love.
I used to believe that an open marriage is a good end-game for seducers, but after this past year I am reconsidering this. Here’s the rub: an Open Marriage is only good if you have a high number of leads available at a given time.
I write that open relationships and even marriages usually work best when the couple interacts most commonly with other couples. If the man and the woman separately pursue their interests, the man is usually going to have a lot more problems. Women who signal openness to casual sex will be overwhelmed by men interested in that. Men who do the same will usually not be.
Marriage in general is dangerous. The man’s wife can decide she luvs another guy and then, in the United States, take half the man’s assets and often part of his earnings for many years to come. Pair-bonding with another guy increases the probability of this happening.
I don’t know a lot about Rakish Love’s background or arrangement but it also seems that, once a marriage is opened, it’s often very hard to close it again, particularly if one party (usually the woman) is successfully f**king other people and the other party is not. New relationship energy (NRE) is a powerful force that destroys many conventional marriages.
I will also commend guys writing honestly online about the bad/dark parts of game, non-monogamy, etc. I have read far too many guys with extremely unlikely stories, success rates, experiences, etc., but in reality very little in male-female interaction/sexuality is 100% good or 100% bad. Stories by guys who are always 100% killing it and getting the hottest chicks… I don’t really believe them. I don’t see anyone who is always doing great, always getting the hottest chicks and retaining them, etc. There are more greys than blacks/whites.
“Rich Like Me: How Assortative Mating Is Driving Income Inequality.” Women with sufficiently high views of themselves also often push themselves out of the mating market altogether. Plenty of spinsters don’t realize that men and women value different things, on average, in the mating market.
But I think there is more to the article than this… I have also said in various places that I want a woman who functions in the world, beyond sex. If she is out of school age and has no job or a marginal job… I am not that interested in a long-term thing with her because she’s revealing that she’s likely f**ked up in some way. Not what I’m looking for in a co-parent or longer-term partner. So I’m driving income inequality in that way.
“Female youth and beauty is the most valuable commodity in the world.” This is why chicks without youth and beauty are so unhappy… nothing they can do can give it to them. Except for younger fat chicks who quit sugar and get on a physical fitness program, but they are in the minority. And guys who can’t access youth and beauty are also unhappy. Many guys, however, have not caught up to the reality that plodding in school, being polite, and getting an okay but unspectacular job is not a good path to the hottest chicks today. A few of us are out here in the wilderness, telling guys what’s what, but the mainstream culture has mostly not caught up. Many guys only discover reality after their first divorce.
The player’s journey blog. If you’re a player you should write one. It’s been much more interesting than I would have thought, especially hearing from other players.
If you write online, your blog becomes a resume of sorts. When I hear from guys, part of what I’m always asking is, “Is this guy full of shit?” There’s usually no way for me to tell from the initial contact. If he has a blog, that lets me quickly browse and try to figure out if he’s full of shit or not. It’s not totally clear and I’m sure some guys fake it (why bother though?)
Plus, sometimes I learn things.
I’ve also said before that the search traffic is a fantastic reason to start a blog. As of this moment, today 25 readers have come through search. I’m sure the majority glance and leave. But how many guys have showed up and had their eyes opened? If you look around you in your real life (you have one of those, yes?), you will notice how f**ked up most guys are. Most guys also lack the knowledge needed to change, the will to change, and the desire to change, but I like to think some readers are seeking the path and will eventually find the path. Then it becomes good to show others the way.
It is dangerous to let a blog replace the life (I have been slightly but noticeably guilty of that). So don’t do that. But if you’re a guy who has been thinking about starting, just do it, and give up if it doesn’t work. I wrote a few things on Reddit, thinking that was all I had to say… then I wrote more… then I realized that Reddit is mostly for newbies… hit WordPress… now I have wasted far too much time doing this but I’ve also learned a lot about myself and heard from interesting other dudes so there’s been substantial benefit as well.
Some of the most interesting conversations are happening privately but you won’t get an invite to them without a public presence.